The Real Reason You Want Your Kids To Learn Chinese. Jeff Applebaum

Dry Bar Comedy
2 200 Դիտումներ 60հզր
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The real reason you want your kids to learn Chinese according to Jeff Applebaum, is so that they can read other peoples tattoos! In this hilarious clip from his first every Dry Bar Comedy special Jeff Applebaum breaks down his multicultural family and the hilarious stories that come from such a dynamic family. Whether you're someone who texts your wife to find out what to get from the grocery store, or just someone who has a child that looks like the last emperor this clip from Jeff Applebaum is sure to keep you laughing from start to finish.

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  1. Jolli Bee
    Jolli Bee
    5 օր առաջ

    Noel here Jeff! I know that man! Had a meal together. Great, great guy for sure! Saw him "LIVE" in Fremont, CA too. He's real funny!

  2. Teri Darcy
    Teri Darcy
    29 օր առաջ

    I am very disappointed with Dry Bar! The comedian, Jeff, is great. But every few seconds, a rather large message pops up saying to watch the full special at such-and-such. I don't remember ever seeing this happen before, on all the Dry Bar videos I have watched. That message usually appears only once. i hope this is not a new trend, because I found it very distracting and annoying.

  3. Andrew McLean
    Andrew McLean
    29 օր առաջ

    You would think the father of a Chinese kid would know that there is no language that is called Chinese there are two languages in China what is Mandarin and one is Cantonese you're welcome

    1. wchu h
      wchu h
      27 օր առաջ

      I mean, I guess. But we all know what he means, most of the times when they mean Chinese they mean mandarin. My family speaks Wenzhounese which is Chinese too.

  4. Thuy Pham
    Thuy Pham
    Ամիս առաջ

    I don't lie I'm right if ecrytbug then be r get in trouble every day and nughr

  5. Thuy Pham
    Thuy Pham
    Ամիս առաջ

    I wonder if they gonna investigate at least and I'm right of evrrythugb

  6. dwd99999dd
    dwd99999dd
    Ամիս առաջ

    Husbands at the grocery store are the worst. They cannot. be. trusted.

  7. Ingrid Fong-Daley
    Ingrid Fong-Daley
    Ամիս առաջ

    My daughter came home from pre-k talking about "Missy Noo-Noo", and we were positive it was gibberish, but she got really mad that we were kinda dismissive when she kept asking for it and we couldn't decode what she meant. Two full years later, I'm seeing Elmo's World on Sesame Street for the first time, and I hear Kevin Clash say "Mr. Noodle" in that helium-ified strangled baby voice, and i'm like "OMG it's Missy Noo-Noo!!" Two full years, and Mr. Noodle was like her Snuffleupagus... we had no idea it was a 'thing'. :) I grew up with old-school Sesame Street. Supergrover was about as modern as I'd gotten. (And seriously, who needs more?) ;) Also: 如果你学中文,你可以去中国当英语老师,赚很多钱。 对不起--i maybe kinda kilt that grammar. And apparently switching language inputs to Chinese pinyin changes font size. I'm not hollering. :) Although, that is kinda how we spoke there, so maybe it's just a super-accurate translation feature.

    1. Wong Jing Hui
      Wong Jing Hui
      Ամիս առաջ

      不要担心,您写的很好!

  8. Corey Purdy
    Corey Purdy
    Ամիս առաջ

    Strange isn't it... if he didn't have a Chinese wife. That first joke would of been deemed racist in towards world.. haha

    1. wchu h
      wchu h
      27 օր առաջ

      Yes, because then he would have a different intention. Here, he means no harm.

  9. Beryl Allando
    Beryl Allando
    Ամիս առաջ

    😂😂😂😂😂

  10. Shantanu Sapru
    Shantanu Sapru
    Ամիս առաջ

    🤣🤣🤣🤣

  11. Wyman Space
    Wyman Space
    Ամիս առաջ

    Do that all the time. Sending pictures or doing video calls … it’s all worth it, otherwise I’ll have to eat up all that she rejects and the kids are not going to help.

  12. Lim Ming Ming
    Lim Ming Ming
    Ամիս առաջ

    this man is Super Gorgeous 😍❤

    1. Dana Bryant
      Dana Bryant
      24 օր առաջ

      ....are you his wife? 😊 Adorable.

  13. Jeff Cabral
    Jeff Cabral
    Ամիս առաջ

    How did men survive without women all these years lol.

  14. Margaret Albrecht US
    Margaret Albrecht US
    Ամիս առաջ

    Hilarious.

  15. Michael K
    Michael K
    Ամիս առաջ

    Haha, I couldn't find something at the store once, and my wife asked me to send her a picture of the shelves where she said it was supposed to be. Of course, she found the item in the picture!

    1. Raymond McGee
      Raymond McGee
      5 օր առաջ

      Haha, nice.

  16. Terri Drollinger
    Terri Drollinger
    Ամիս առաջ

    🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  17. Namugalu Iryn
    Namugalu Iryn
    Ամիս առաջ

    In the mall I see a lot of men taking pictures of things before they buy them. That's the standard rule

    1. Raymond McGee
      Raymond McGee
      5 օր առաջ

      Truth. My wife has learned to just text me screen shots of what she wants with quantities/ etc. I only call to confirm proper substitutes if the store is out of something.

    2. Peppered Saltine
      Peppered Saltine
      24 օր առաջ

      My dad does that with stuff he's planning to buy a few days from then or whatever- he gets the thing and the price in the picture and texts himself about it so he remembers

    3. Peppered Saltine
      Peppered Saltine
      24 օր առաջ

      My dad does that with stuff he's planning to buy a few days from then or whatever- he gets the thing and the price in the picture and texts himself about it so he remembers

    4. Shane Drew
      Shane Drew
      Ամիս առաջ

      I do it every time. Its basically risk free :)

  18. Wolf Thorn
    Wolf Thorn
    Ամիս առաջ

    Blah blah... race blah.... boring....

  19. Lana Jig-maker
    Lana Jig-maker
    Ամիս առաջ

    I couldn't find much funny, but that's probably because it is 4:48 am. Either nothing is funny at that time, or everything is funny at that time.

  20. djuraster
    djuraster
    Ամիս առաջ

    finally someone funny

  21. Anish John-Thomas
    Anish John-Thomas
    Ամիս առաջ

    I’ve been taking pictures for years! Worst part is when there’s not enough cell phone signal in the store. (5G…my foot!). Take a pic, leave the isle, go to the front of the store, come back and…repeat! 😥 (I would gladly do that instead of returning the item.)

    1. Primalxbeast
      Primalxbeast
      Ամիս առաջ

      @Anish John-Thomas I don't really use my phone indoors, so I don't know about that, but I know I don't get 5g outdoors.

    2. Anish John-Thomas
      Anish John-Thomas
      Ամիս առաջ

      @Primalxbeast Theoretically 5G is supposed to work inside the buildings better, but I’ll experiment. Anyways bachelors who are reading the comments, take note. Data plan is a necessity. 🤓

    3. Primalxbeast
      Primalxbeast
      Ամիս առաջ

      I never have my phone set on 5g, I noticed very quickly that it doesn't work, and it's probably wasting battery power having it try to find a 5g signal. 4g works better.

    4. Ikwo Ndiomu
      Ikwo Ndiomu
      Ամիս առաջ

      🤣🤣🤣🤣

  22. NICK Z
    NICK Z
    Ամիս առաջ

    So FUNNY! I am American living in Taiwan for the past 13 years, married to a Taiwanese wife for 15. This guy made me laugh out loud.

  23. Tracy
    Tracy
    Ամիս առաջ

    I like him and his diversity. 👏👏

  24. MrsGreen Apple
    MrsGreen Apple
    Ամիս առաջ

    So true😂🤣🙃

  25. E K Daufin
    E K Daufin
    Ամիս առաջ

    Their Chinese heritage is important.

  26. Ian Foote
    Ian Foote
    Ամիս առաջ

    I guess that's why I'm single. Send me to the store? Lmao!

  27. Brianna Dickson
    Brianna Dickson
    Ամիս առաջ

    It sounds like barking. I guess you are what you eat.

  28. Robert Schwartz
    Robert Schwartz
    Ամիս առաջ

    MOLOTOV! MAZEL TOV! Oh well, any cocktail is fine with me!

  29. man of culture
    man of culture
    Ամիս առաջ

    This guy's jokes and timing are on point! The best clip I've seen for a while!

  30. Paul Miner
    Paul Miner
    Ամիս առաջ

    I'm just old enough to have seen The Last Emperor 😅

    1. Tankerrex3
      Tankerrex3
      22 օր առաջ

      nah you just need to know some geopolitical history of China's final dynasty and you're good, who needs a movie amirite

  31. 1 Best Friend 2 u
    1 Best Friend 2 u
    Ամիս առաջ

    That's a wise man you should follow his lead😆😆😂

  32. Jae Grant
    Jae Grant
    Ամիս առաջ

    “Black” is not very descriptive. Clarified as African American in the next sentence, but at first I was where from black? AUstralian aboriginal, Indian, Fijian Indian, Somalian, Nigerian, Jamaican? Not all black people live n America

    1. Primalxbeast
      Primalxbeast
      Ամիս առաջ

      @Misime33 Most of the time when Americans say African American, they just mean black. It may not make any sense, but that's what it usually means.

    2. Misime33
      Misime33
      Ամիս առաջ

      @Azure X I’m giving an American perspective to something a lot of people who may not be aware of Black history don’t know.

    3. Azure X
      Azure X
      Ամիս առաջ

      If that's immediately where your mind went in that short moment, you got some problems, friend.

    4. Misime33
      Misime33
      Ամիս առաջ

      @Dede Hugh I have noticed a lot of people (who happen to be foreigners) always ask “what does black mean”? In reference to a description. The answer is more historical and cultural than ethnic. Which is why I said Americans know what what black means, even as vague as the word implies.

    5. Dede Hugh
      Dede Hugh
      Ամիս առաջ

      Joe, why does it matter to you? There has to be a reason you mentioned it and I'm genuinely interested.

  33. Gromitz101
    Gromitz101
    Ամիս առաջ

    Don't send a man to get groceries, he doesn't care which product he gets, completion is the only objective. If you are the wife and care, put the product name and brand if it matters, otherwise don't complain...

    1. J Turner
      J Turner
      29 օր առաջ

      @✨Star Lit Oracle✨ there’s nothing mysterious. If he wanted to, he would. You don’t have to take on the mental burden of everything

    2. ✨Star Lit Oracle✨
      ✨Star Lit Oracle✨
      Ամիս առաջ

      I always thought his lack of caring was him trying to annoy or laziness, Thankyou for explaining the mysterious male mind 💕

    3. Russ Holly
      Russ Holly
      Ամիս առաջ

      I send mine screenshots of the items from the store with the isle, section it's in and the price. He usually does pretty well but this year has been a bit harder with the empty shelf's of certain items.

  34. Simon Grey
    Simon Grey
    Ամիս առաջ

    Funnies thing about all those shows, is how all those -men- males are groveling before their wives.

    1. Primalxbeast
      Primalxbeast
      Ամիս առաջ

      It's an indirect way of joking about women.

  35. cl robinson
    cl robinson
    Ամիս առաջ

    I wish my husband would take pictures. He describes every. single. thing. on. the. shelf.

    1. watch this
      watch this
      Ամիս առաջ

      Go your self problem solved

    2. phyliciawilliams15
      phyliciawilliams15
      Ամիս առաջ

      My husband usually takes pics, this was up until he had to go look for a pregnancy test. He called and described everything. Literally his statements. “They all say specific things!” “Is it specific to your menstrual cycle?” “Do you know when your menstrual cycle is?” “Do you need one that tells you when your ovulating?” I tried to explain he’s thinking too much into it just grab me a test. It obviously wasn’t that easy. It took awhile.

    3. Blueberry Fundip FFXIV
      Blueberry Fundip FFXIV
      Ամիս առաջ

      Ok

    4. Teresa Yeates
      Teresa Yeates
      Ամիս առաջ

      Maybe that is his passive aggressive way of getting back at you for complaining about what he buys?

    5. VolfKami
      VolfKami
      Ամիս առաջ

      Your husband has dad humour, well petty dad humour, but it reminded me of my dad and made me chuckle. Thanks for that

  36. Marylu Tyger
    Marylu Tyger
    Ամիս առաջ

    Love Jeff Applebaum!

  37. Timmy Bankson
    Timmy Bankson
    Ամիս առաջ

    I can so relate

  38. ChildoftheMostHigh
    ChildoftheMostHigh
    Ամիս առաջ

    This is hilarious. I watched it twice back to back just now.😄

  39. RobRot
    RobRot
    Ամիս առաջ

    That old guy at the store sounds like me!

    1. RobRot
      RobRot
      Ամիս առաջ

      @Kunai Cheesnep The upside down flag stands for distress. It started in ww2 with a captured American base, the Japanese had the American soldiers raise the flag like everything was normal but they didn’t realize that the Americans were hanging it upside down. A brilliant idea that got our American troops rescued.

    2. Kunai Cheesnep
      Kunai Cheesnep
      Ամիս առաջ

      That upside down flag sure is a statement. Of what I’m not sure. Edit: before you say anything about my political beliefs or my profile picture yes. I’m a furry and no I’m not liberal. I’m a historian.

  40. Theophilus Jedediah
    Theophilus Jedediah
    Ամիս առաջ

    If the Biden administration gets it’s way all of America will need to learn Chinese.

    1. Janina Carter
      Janina Carter
      Ամիս առաջ

      Well that page is now down but if you want the truth about tRumps deals with China and all his criminal activity just read his official Wikipedia page as 45th President instead of listening to his lies!

  41. Major Old Lady aka, Mom
    Major Old Lady aka, Mom
    Ամիս առաջ

    Once again, thanks so much, DB, for uplifting our spirits and hearts, even if it's only for a few minutes, full specials or a montage of old clips. Yay!! I'm always happy to see your Notifications. 👍 Might want to change "every" to "ever" in the Description down below... Don'tcha just hate it when SPELLCHECK doesn't happen? Than, then, two, to, two? Love you, DB... more than you'll ever know, from your eternal sister in Christ somewhere near Seattle. Thanks again... 🤣 BTW, this guy is brilliant. More of him? Please? He's wonderful. ⚘🙏❤🙏⚘

    1. Heather Lube-Bomba
      Heather Lube-Bomba
      Ամիս առաջ

      This is such a nice, wholesome comment. I'm sure DryBar will be happy to see it.

    2. Grumpy Old Guy
      Grumpy Old Guy
      Ամիս առաջ

      @Akenani Menatseah No. I just have a low tolerance for morons.

    3. Akenani Menatseah
      Akenani Menatseah
      Ամիս առաջ

      @Grumpy Old Guy Haha your name checks out

    4. Grumpy Old Guy
      Grumpy Old Guy
      Ամիս առաջ

      It seems that someone has way too much time on her hands.

  42. Katastic
    Katastic
    Ամիս առաջ

    This is hilarious

  43. Oswald Gilharry
    Oswald Gilharry
    Ամիս առաջ

    Around racist to me

    1. Major Old Lady aka, Mom
      Major Old Lady aka, Mom
      Ամիս առաջ

      Around racists... ? Sounds like racism? Nope. They are a multi-cultural family, and embrace it. You should, too?

  44. Russell Marsh
    Russell Marsh
    Ամիս առաջ

    Hey, this is funny.

  45. Estelle V.W.
    Estelle V.W.
    Ամիս առաջ

    I dont think so!!

  46. Iguanas Place
    Iguanas Place
    Ամիս առաջ

    FIRST!!!!! GIVE YOUR BOI A NUTRI GRAIN BAR!

    1. Grumpy Old Guy
      Grumpy Old Guy
      Ամիս առաջ

      @NT Lo Look at you trying to be a psychiatrist, when the only degree you have is in Bovine Scatology.

    2. NT Lo
      NT Lo
      Ամիս առաջ

      @Grumpy Old Guy you’re projecting 🤣

    3. Grumpy Old Guy
      Grumpy Old Guy
      Ամիս առաջ

      @NT Lo not at all. I just know that people like you love putting things in strange places.

    4. NT Lo
      NT Lo
      Ամիս առաջ

      @Grumpy Old Guy you have a weird obsession with suppository. You might want to discuss that next time you see your therapist! 😂

    5. Grumpy Old Guy
      Grumpy Old Guy
      Ամիս առաջ

      @NT Lo take your "you're" and use it as a suppository. Got it?